Fasting: End

It was an interesting week.

Class on Tuesday was a bad idea. Trying to sleep after that was impossible. My entire chest pounded with my heart all night. My body had nothing with which to repair the damaged muscle; so it just ached. And, as I tossed and turned, my stomach felt like it was ulcering on whatever side was down. But, with any agony, our mental resistance to it makes it worse. I couldn't or didn't want to change the situation, and, in truth, this was what I set out to experience, which brought a sense of joy into it.... believe it or not. I'm not going to pretend that it helped me sleep, but accepting the discomfort alleviates the anguish of it. It reminded me of that which was unaffected.

I "woke up" on Wednesday, and the discomfort left as I started moving around. By this point in the week, getting out bed every morning requires some deep breathing first. I wondered how I could possibly recover from Tuesday's workout without some calories. But, while the more extreme exhaustion lasted through most of Wednesday, by Thursday I was feeling... almost good; so much so that I considered going to class again.... I didn't. Yet, with the ease with which I made it though Friday, I kinda wished I had gone just so I could say I really suffered in the last few days. The goal was, after all, to explore a limitation. Instead, I coped pretty well, and it amazed me.

Hunger, it turns out, feels more like exhaustion and thirst. In fact, I may confuse being hungry and being thirsty, eating when I'm actually just in need of some water. I'm not sure.

Also, Despite poorly sleeping and being exhausted, part of me knew that I still had something in reserve. If the shit hit the fan, I'd still be able to pull it all together and do what I needed to, an experience I had through most of class... with each pause, the energy would collapse back into me, and then just be there again when I needed it.

It was amazing to witness resilience I didn't know I had, and I'm grateful for the experience.

Fasting: Day 2

I woke up this morning feeling pretty good (surprisingly), but it didn't take too long for me to crash from that. The rest of the morning was bad, but I picked up around noon and was actually functional. I made it through the day without really feeling hungry, but it interesting how my mind will snap to an image of me eating food. Where I would usually indulge that desire without thinking about it, I now have to consciously recognize it.

I felt good enough to go to karate class. I made it through most of it before stopping. I kept thinking that I'm not going to be able to replenish whatever energy I expend until Friday. I stopped fearing that I'd burn out before then.

It amazes me how functional I actually am. Despite the fatigue, I feel like I can make it to Friday without too much trouble.

Fasting

I'm reading a side-article titled In Defense of Hunger in the latest issue of GQ (June 2009), which claims I've never felt actual hunger. Instead, my stomach has gotten used to receiving food at certain times in the day, and, when I miss a meal, it complains.

That piqued my curiosity. What does hunger feel like?

If that wasn't enough, the other interesting point from the article: "a hungry mind is a focused mind," which makes sense from an evolutionary perspective. If they partly evolved as survival tools, our minds should be active and focused when they need to find a scarce necessity. The author, Mark Adams, fasted for a few days and found that his memory and focus improved... after he started eating again.

I heard some maxim somewhere that the body can last 3 seconds without blood, 3 minutes without oxygen, 3 days without water, and 3 weeks without food. Gandhi apparently pushed the three week limit... on two occasions. I'm not that ambitious.

60 minutes also ran a segment this week about a 'survival' gene that gets activated when we go on extreme diets. The gene purportedly fights heart disease, diabetes, cancer, and slows aging (are you kidding me?). And, of course, a drug company is testing a new one that tricks the body into activating the gene. ...where's the merit or discipline in that?

The Goal: consume only water and a daily vitamin for 5 days.

Workouts are going to be a bit of an issue. It kind of has me wondering if these people extolling the health benefits of fasting do any kind of strenuous physical activity.... ever. But the idea here is to push a boundary; so I'm still going to attempt a workout or two and see what I'm capable of.

I don't want to die only ever having played it safe.

This will be fun...