Smoking Ban

Allegheny County Council voted to ban smoking in all public places last Tuesday, and I, for one, couldn't be happier. I lived most of my 21+ years in NY where the ban is statewide. It made the club/bar experience so much better. Aside from the obvious health benefits, I could come home without having to stuff my clothing into a biohazard bag. So here's to a lower dry cleaning bill. YAH!!!!

Under most circumstances, I'm all for more freedom. In fact, I think all recreational drugs should be legal. Roe vs. Wade precluded a right to privacy with respect to our bodies, so that if you want to destroy yours, that's your choice. As long as I don't have to inhale your second hand smoke, drive next to your intoxicated ass on the road, or pay for your recovery, you can do as you please. We all share the same air, though. One smoker imposes his choice to smoke on everyone else in the bar who's decided against it. It's common courtesy not to, but that just doesn't happen. So I welcome the ban. Smokers blaze on! Just not around me.

The Economics of Social Dynamics

Imagine you're a nightclub or bar owner. You need to get people to your venue who'll pay your cover charge and buy your alcohol. How do motivate 20-somethings to choose your place over every other Pittsburgh option?

The rule of thumb is that your average, sexually frustrated guy will spend the most money in any given night, and he's going to populate any place that lets him get drunk cheaply and stare at hott girls in hopes that one of them will bump into him and somehow wind up in his bed.

Cheap alcohol isn't a problem, but getting hott women to the venue is. In particular, an owner wants the kind of woman with the total package. She dresses to accentuate a body that only someone with a good personality should have, she puts herself on display confidently competing with every other girl for attention, but she carries herself with an attitude that makes the average guy tremble in fear, believing he's got not a single chance in hell of getting with her. Yet he'll bring his money back every week simply for the proximity possibility. Because of this, hott women are generally considered nightlife currency and as such are given special attention ... or are even paid to show up. Prive has at least one barback who stands around alone like she wants someone to talk to her when she's not collecting empty glasses.

I've noticed, though, that advertising in Pittsburgh is male oriented. It's usually, "Come see our hott bartenders and dancers, and get alcohol poisoning for a quarter." It does directly target the one's who'll spend their money on it; so I'm sure it's effective. But it got me thinking, how do you advertise a club to the women you want to show up?

Pittsburgh venues that attract the most women have one commonality: loud music and a dance floor. My assumption about this is that women want attention or at least more attention than any other girl is getting, but having to talk and interact with every stupid, drunk loser in the place gets annoying. Thus, the loud music drowns out most conversations that would normally start up with guys and the dance floor makes most guys too self-conscious to get out there with her (on her). It keeps most guys at a distance while still attracting their attention. Margarita Mama's even promotes this by only letting girls get up and dance on any structure in the place.

One thing is missing from the equation, though: single women are all looking for a strong, dominant, confident man, which is far more rare than a hott woman (count how many guys like that you see out at a club and how many hott girls you see there). Among all the bullshit guys, she's kinda hoping her superior ability to attraction attention will land a truly sought-after guy. And that drive will keep her coming back to a place.

By filling a club with socially powerful, strong, confident men, and attractive women will instinctively flock there to compete for attention, and they'll have a much better time doing it. But like I said, we're rare... and we know it.

The Recap. The strong, confident guys know how to give a girl a great time, motivating them to frequent a place where that happens. Following the hott women are throngs of average, sexually frustrated guys who'll spend their hard earned money on socially accepted, destructive habits, generously contributing to the venue's bottom line. And that is the economics of social dynamics.

Farewell Crazy Horse Saloon

I've never been to the place, but I'm sorry to see it go. If you're going to go down... in flames would be the way to do. At least you didn't end up like that bar in Rhode Island.

The Proximity Head Jerk

I've noticed recently, when I walk up to a group of girls and start a conversation, a group of guys are inevitably within three to five feet of the girls and at least one of them snaps his head over to look at me as if a bomb just dropped on his apartment building.

I feel bad for the guy because it's so obvious that he and his friends where standing there hoping something would happen to facilitate him meeting the girls, and to have me come in means I got there first. He's SOL.

It happens with girls too who see another girl come up to talk to me and my buddies (yeah, it happens from time to time). The difference is that I'll usually go talk to the girl in waiting later. It doesn't necessarily kill her chances. Guys who stand there are shooting themselves in the foot showing that they don't have the balls to just go up to her.