Boardwalk Fridays

Last night, my friends and I were short on something to do in Pittsburgh, a rarity these days. Looking for something different, I remembered The Boardwalk, a riverfront conglomeration of ever-charging night clubs, recently started giving away free drinks and free cover on Fridays.

When we got there, we found out why. The place was DEAD... and probably has been on a weekly basis since the last time we went there (last year). The promotion clearly reflected their desperation for patrons as did the drinks we received... I'm pretty sure there was coke in my rum, but I couldn't taste it. After two, my friend and I were on our asses and got the bright idea that it would be great if we joined the two old women dancing to the band's cover of Usher's Yeah. I think we made their year, but we quickly got bored and left when one grabbed my ass. At one point, I decided it was too hot and I needed to jump in the pool... I was sober enough to ditch the cell phone first.

Moral of the story: the rumors are false. The Boardwalk pretty much sucks in the summer too.

What's so X-rated?

The new nightclub on the block, X-bar (formerly Touch), touts itself as the country's first X-rated nightclub. My buddies and I go check it out opening night to find it no different than its predecessor. They now have more platforms for dancers sporting some decent lingerie. The bartenders are actually more covered than when the place was called Touch; although, the black corsets are decidedly hotter. And the rumored "human pet" was no where that we could see, which they apparently had before too.

So what exactly makes the place "X-rated?" In terms of movies, lingerie gets you what? PG-13 at best. Brief or partial nudity gets you and R. But X? come on. If you're going to make an outrageous claim like "the country's first X-rated," you should actually be, in some way, ...outrageous.

Nonetheless, the dancers are fun to mess with (we're nice), and the bartenders are kind of cool. The place generates a lot of testosterone, though. I prefer dealing with estrogen.

Touch Nightclub.... No more?

On our way to KROBAR, my friends and I noticed that the doors for Touch were closed and the sign has been taken off the side of the building. The place looked dead.

We knew the incident that took place there had an effect on their business when they started Pennies from Heaven night, but we didn't think their business was suffering that much. And yet, a day or two ago, a flyer comes to me about some event that taking place there... and I'm confused.

Does anyone know if they're actually closed?

Farewell Crazy Horse Saloon

I've never been to the place, but I'm sorry to see it go. If you're going to go down... in flames would be the way to do. At least you didn't end up like that bar in Rhode Island.